The first words out of mine mouth once photos arised of Ariana Grande’s engagement ring were, “Holy hell, that point is huge.”


The 3 carat pear-shaped ring—which reportedly expense Pete Davidson practically $100,000—is so big that as soon as I observed Ariana Grande in concert a few months ago, I had a clear watch of it from the eighth row. And also yes, in instance you to be wondering, the is just as beautiful in genuine life as it is in the paparazzi shots.

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So when the team at communicate Studio available me the possibility to wear an accurate cubic zirconia replica the the ring for a main (not a real diamond, sadly), ns jumped in ~ the chance. “You’re going to obtain robbed walking under the street through that thing,” my ideal friend warned me when I said her i was walk to pick it up. I rolled my eyes at her and rode off right into the sunset towards my ~ do so engagement.


From the moment I placed the ring on, ns couldn’t avoid staring at it. At some point in yoga class, i literally dropped out the a pose since I to be so distracted by my own bling. Every morning when I got dressed, i was shocked at just how glamorous the ring make every outfit feel, whether I was in a cocktail dress or the raggedy university sweatshirt i stole from an old boyfriend. I took ring take self after ring take self (to the very confused reactions of mine Instagram followers), and, frankly, loved the way I looked with an iceberg size diamond on mine finger.


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Photo through Zoe Weiner

"Sometimes people say something the they think is a compliment that isn’t,” etiquette skilled Jodi smith told me end the phone. "Sometimes human being will look in ~ a ring and be like, ‘Whoa, that’s a really big rock.’ and they median that as a yes, really nice compliment, prefer ‘Wow, what an high-quality ring.’ however when you’re the human whose hand the on, it doesn’t necessarily sound choose a compliment. The sounds prefer they"re evaluate the amount spent...it comes out together accusatorially jealous—it’s not kind, and it’s no congratulatory.”


Of course, world get comments around their ring regardless of the size. “When space you gaining your upgrade?” “It’s not a diamond and it’s that small?” “...That’s it?” space all actual, actual life concerns that world have asked my friends, which, just, wow.


The right method to talk around someone’s engagement—stranger, friend, or otherwise—has naught to perform with the dimension of the ring. "When somebody claims 'I obtained engaged,' the first thing you say must not be, 'Let me see the ring,'” states Smith. "The proper an answer is ‘That’s therefore exciting,’ ‘Congratulations,’ or 'I’m therefore happy because that you.’ Then, when you’ve expressed her congratulations, you deserve to ask to watch the ring, if the person has one.”


When you do look at the ring, the easiest thing come say is, simply, that it's beautiful. “If you don’t think the beautiful, girlfriend don’t have to lie—you have the right to say, 'what an interesting setting,' or 'that’s therefore exciting,'” says Smith. "There’s constantly something you can say it is positive and that doesn’t straight or indirectly get at the price of the ring. An engagement ring is a gift, and also to speak come the receiver of a gift about how much the giver the a gift invested is inappropriate.”


If you occur to uncover yourself ~ above the receiving end of one of these uncomfortable lines of questioning, nothing feel choose you owe it to anyone to answer. "The best solution is "thank you," claimed brightly and cheerfully together if it were a compliment, even if it is it to be intended to it is in a compliment or not," states Smith.

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After spending months lusting after, commenting on, and also even writing around the dimension of Ariana Grande’s diamond from afar, security a main in her shoes (or, more aptly, in she ring), make me realize the the dimension or expense of who else’s absent isn’t mine—or anyone else’s—damn business.